6 December 2012

#18 - Enjoy time Alone.

Being alone is something I've always struggled with. I would shudder at the thought of sitting in a cafe,  shopping or exploring a new place alone. Even in the comfort of my own home, weekends alone would drag (which is something that, as a football-widow with not too many friends, happens every other week). I've always found it difficult to keep myself entertained.

A few months ago I decided this was no good. I wanted to be comfortable with my own company and make the most of my time. Turns out the solution was actually completely simple. I bought myself a little notepad.

And with that notepad I started to sit in a cafe on my lunch hour. I sketched and made lists. All with a wonderful coffee by my side. It suddenly seemed like I had masses of spare time. I have no idea how I managed to waste that time before. I had the time to plan things, research and read. I plotted a little trip for myself. And you know what? The trip was fun! Being able to do what I want without the worry of my company getting irksome easily out-weighed the awkwardness I initially felt. I spent ridiculous amounts of time in second hand book-stores, taking photographs of flowers and staring through a bakers window at all the amazing bread trying to decide which one to go in and buy. It was completely my time.


Don't get me wrong, I love spending time with friends, specifically I love spending time with Dixon. I'm just starting to see the benefits of sometimes being with me. And thats something I would never thought I'd say. I'm even thinking that maybe in the Spring I'll take a trip out to the lake district for the weekend, or maybe to the coast. Really test myself.

With a coffee and a notepad I can go anywhere. (As long anything doesn't mean going to a restaurant alone I am so NOT ready for that).

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You can read all about and follow my adventures through all my pre-25 challenges here.

11 comments:

  1. good for you! I work at the same university as my husband and then we also work together on our label. I love spending time with him and my friends but my ultimate treat to myself is a lone trip to the movies. Plus I don't have to share my movie chocolate with anyone!

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    1. I've never thought about going to the cinema alone, I always annoy people I watch films with by asking questions constantly, so maybe that'd be the solution!

      And, of course, all the popcorn for me!

      chloex

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  2. As a fellow football widow I feel your pain and also share your love for sitting in coffee shops with a notebook or my knitting. Sometimes you can't beat having some alone time.

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    1. I always give up on knitting projects before i dont have the time and/or patience. Maybe this is the perfect chance to actually finish something!


      chloex

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    2. Don't worry, I've been knitting a blanket for almost a year and I'm only half finished. x

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  3. You will so totally get to the point where you can eat alone. If I travel for work, I have to do it, and I have learned to enjoy it. I order myself a beer, bring my book and just enjoy some quiet time. You definitely have to pick that right restaurant for such an outing, but when you do, it feels pretty good. It's awkward for all of five minutes and then, I start to feel super empowered. I start to think of what people see when they look at me. I know it could go either way. Some people might question why a young lady such as myself would be caught dead eating alone, and others might think, "wow that's one confident and comfortable mamacita."

    Alone time is definitely unnerving, but I've learned to enjoy it too. I've started going on outdoor adventures alone and things like that, as well. I've even been up to the ski hill all by myself. It's weird on the chairlift, but once I'm flying down the hill, no one knows I'm alone. It's not like you ski down right next to your pals, right? So, who cares. Plus, I'm a tentative skier, so it's nice for me not to feel rushed.

    Anyway, all of this is to say, being alone can be lovely. I'm glad you're realizing that!!

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    1. I have eaten alone in coffee shops, but resturants seem daunting! I wont rule it out in the future though.

      I'm slowly learning to enjoy time alone. I quite like the idea of having a weekend away by myself. Skiing alone sounds fun!! I would love to do that (not that I'd be any good at skiing, I imagine)

      chloex

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  4. I love spending time in my own company but I used to panic at the thought of being alone in very public places. It was as though everyone else knew I was there alone, ha ha. I don't know why but I felt nervous about doing certain things alone but slowly I'm learning to embrace it and shopping or having coffee isn't such an issue as long as you've a book. Although there are still many alone situations that make me nervous, I'm getting better. I have eaten alone, once, and i'll admit it made me a little anxious but I was in a cafe that I go to all the time so I think that helped.

    When I'm traveling to new places I google map the place beforehand and then 'walk' the route from the train/bus station to whatever destination i've chosen, making a note of certain landmarks along the way. I find it helps me to gain a little more confidence and I feel like I know where I'm going once I arrive and then I can explore from there.

    good luck out there & I can't wait to hear about all your new (alone) adventures!

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    1. I know that feeling!! I always felt awful shopping like everyone one sneering at me being alone.

      Haha, I do that same thing with google maps! I hate getting lost whilst alone, now that really sucks. So i avoid it at all costs.

      Thank you! And you too


      Chloexx

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  5. Enjoying your own company is so great! It took me a long time to be ok with it too. But, then I moved to another country, on my own, and I didn't have a choice. And now I love it. Don't get me wrong, I love being with my family, boy & friends, but I also really love my alone time. I shop, I go to the movies, I even go to restaurants. Go you!!

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    1. Wow, moving to a new contry alone is a huge step!! You know what, I think I would love that. Start fresh and have to do things yourself. Well done you!!

      Chloexx

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Thank you so much for leaving your thoughts. I love to hear what you all think and I do read every single one soooo if you have a question, feel free to ask!

chloe x

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